6/9/24
I started writing in my notes app just now, using it as my own diary. The last time I had a physical diary was when I was in 3rd grade. My parents and sister found it and made fun of me because my rants in the diary were actually so funny, haha. Now that I'm grown and reading that old diary, I'm in awe of how cute and innocent I was as a kid and how fun it was to have an outlet to rant. As I'm picking up writing again, I'm trying to determine if I should make a section on my website where I can publicly share my rants. However, I'm not going to make it a prominent link like "CLICK THIS NOW!!!". I might just create a little favicon or something and link it to this, almost like a secret area. If anyone is reading this (which no one is because this is a locked note on my phone), HAI! If I do end up sharing this, I might paste it into my diary once I get around to coding all that stuff. I've just been busy with other things and haven't had much time to work on my website. I want to make a shrine section where I can geek out over the things I enjoy without spamming my Tumblr or Twitter pages. Hopefully, everything works out!

12/06/24
Hello! It’s currently Friday, two days before my birthday. I’m writing this while working on my schoolwork and also watching my boyfriend play elden ring. Hello, boyfriend!1!!1! I don’t know if you still check this tab, but hello I love you, and you’re doing great at elden ring. I’ve been doing pretty well recently. Life had a crazy rough patch not too long ago, where everything seemed to crumble right in front of me. I became really overwhelmed, and then Hurricane Helene hit and made everything even worse, lol. I was struggling mentally feeling really down about my body image, self-worth, and figuring out my future. the usual teenage girl stuff. However, I’ve cleared most of that up, and I’ve been doing pretty good now. I have an amazing support system with my friends, my boyfriend, and even my family I’ve been getting closer with them lately. Things are looking up, I was accepted into college, my birthday is coming up, and my relationships with people have been going really well,yayayay. I’ve been feeling super motivated. Usually, I get really depressed over the winter, but this year I’m feeling alright. I’m happy!! Looking back, last year was one of the hardest times of my life. It’s kind of crazy to reflect on that and see how much I’ve grown and how much better I’m doing now. It’s pretty awesome. I’m currently unemployed, which might be why I feel happier, but I really need to start working soon. I plan to get a job after this semester of school. I just don’t have the energy to work right now unless it’s some super easy corporate job, but those are usually full-time, and I’m already a full-time student. Thank god I don’t have to do that (yet… sad face). As for my website, I feel like I’ve been neglecting it a bit, and that makes me sad. I don’t have much free time to keep it polished, but I’ve been doing at least one or two updates a month mostly when I have enough new art to add. I have plans to improve it over the summer, so trust me, it’s coming! I’ve wanted to start some new projects too, but I just haven’t had the time or motivation. Can you tell I’m lazy? It’s okay, things will come together eventually. A project that takes time will be better than something rushed. Anyway, that’s it for now! :3

6/15/24
Hello, I'm updating my life. Recently, I've been in this weird phase of just feeling empty. That sounds so edgy, my God, but I say it in a non-edgy way. I don't know how to explain it, but I've just been feeling fat and lazy; nothing interests me much anymore. The Elden Ring DLC is releasing soon, though, and I'm pretty hyped for that. I was talking to one of my friends about love, friends, family— you know, the usual late-night conversation stuff. We were just ranting to each other back and forth, and I was talking about a past relationship that ended badly. It's been like a never-ending battle just to be on mutual terms with them. Blah blah, but long story short, my friend told me that I'm being too kind to this person and how they treated me poorly, and that I don't owe them anything anymore. They are right, but it's so weird to me how that's how humans think—like we are all just wired to be disrespectful because they started it or something. How weird is that?! I grew up under the golden rule, and I've carried it with me forever. I do notice that whenever I treat someone poorly, karma hits me back, to be honest. That's why I've stopped being a jerk. I'm all about forgiveness and love. I'm empathetic and loving—what can I say...............

7/12/24
Hi, I've been painting and working on art as usual. I've also been applying to jobs like crazy, which makes you wonder why an internet girl would want to work. LOL, I wish I didn't have to, but I need money and to keep myself busy. It might sound edgy, but I'm pretty bored with my life. There isn't much to do. I usually wake up, work on art, play games, apply to jobs, call back the jobs I've applied to, go out for a cigarette, go back in, draw, game, sleep at 4 AM, wake up at 2 PM, and repeat my day. I know it's summer, and this is my time to relax, but I'm so bored. I just want to do things. I don't really have friends besides my online ones, and my real-life friends are pretty busy with jobs, relationships, and other things, so there's no one to hang out with. I don't mind, but in the back of my head, I do. I get teased for having no friends, and I'm pretty aware it's loser behavior, but it's what's best for me. It's not that bad anyway. Like an online friend of mine said, "You get used to it," and you really do. Anyway, enough of the edge. I'm working on a comic called Biosynth, and I've just started the first chapter. I've been writing the story plot for about two months now, including character data, backgrounds, and other stuff regarding the characters. It's coming along, and I'm pretty excited for the day I release chapter one! I know I'm a bit of a nobody on the internet, so the comic may not blow up like I want it to, but it's something to keep my mind busy. Anyway, that's really all I wanted to rant about. Maybe I'll find something else and edit this. Hmm.